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Wellness is not the absence
of disease. It is the presence of something -- the question is of
what?
As I actively interacted with my patients, I observed over and
over again that despite their infinitely varied and unique symptoms
and personal backgrounds, the elements that determined their well-being
or distress were strikingly predictable. This lead to the hypothesis
that there may be certain psychological spheres which when fulfilled
built successful psychological adjustment, and when unfulfilled
or repeatedly neglected, caused distress and made one vulnerable
to distress.
By 1975, I realized that the three spheres critical to building
health in our daily lives were quite simple. These three spheres
--self, intimacy, and achievement -- remain broad enough to encompass
nearly all psychological events. None of the spheres exist in isolation.
They are overlapping and inter-related. These three spheres together
dynamically interact and constitute a person's personality.
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To be "in touch," "at peace,"
and "in control" of self requires the capacity to recognize and accept
both positives and negatives in life, integrating them into a balanced
perspective. It also includes the flexibility to initiate, modify,
and control thoughts, feelings, and actions.
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To extend one's thoughts, feelings, and
actions beyond the self and become close to another human being. Many
different types of intimate relationships such as those with a parent,
spouse, significant other, children, friends, or God can bolster the
psyche. The couple relationship, however, enables human beings to
experience fullest union of personality, in all three dimensions of
human intimacy - Intellectual/Social, Emotional, and Physical/Sexual.
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To reach beyond the self through the productive,
creative, and the constructive expression of one's capacities. It
is an indirect way of finding an intimate union or relationship with
the world in which one lives. Behind one's work, career, athletics,
hobbies or other intellectual and productive activities is the desire
not only to subsist, but also to find meaning and achieve value, acceptance,
respect, admiration and deep down love. A person who is either unable
or unwilling to build a relationship with the world through his or
her constructive capacities may turn in desperation to destruction
- an attempt to be noticed and counted and freed from total insignificance
by a forced relationship of dominance.
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To learn more about the three spheres and how they may apply to
building health in your life, see "Introduction to Lifetrack"
chapter in my eManual, "Breakthrough
Intimacy - Sad to Happy through Closeness".
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